stick an iron in the fire

Every so often I re-brand myself. My brand is me. It is how potential employers see me. It is recognition. I'm in the mood to rebrand myself again soon. Please selct the brand below that you like and share ur choice with me. you can email me at floralgod@gmail.com

You can also visit my website at http://patrickknight.net/

#1 current Brand

Option #2

Option #3






Option #4



Option #5

Option #6

Thanks for playing our game... Sorry all the parting gifts have been sold at the flea market or served at a mass dinner for rice a roni fanatics.

give a man a digital camera...

Got a new Digital SLR camera recently. LOVE IT

here's just a few shots that i really liked.

A wedding reception at the Four Seasons.

Moments before walking down the aisle at Villa Montalvo.

The ringbearer and flowergirl at a wedding in Sonoma.

Taken at the Conservatory of Flowers in Golden Gate Park.


Taken at The Conservatory of Flowers in Golden Gate Park.


Clematis in the Sonoma sunshine.

Conservatory of Flowers in Golden Gate Park.

Nuttin says luvin like a dead cat on the lawn

Have you ever been someplace and the toddlers were better behaved than the adults?

I witnessed a wedding the other day in Sebastopol. And yes, the children had more manners, more class and better shoes than the adults.

OK here goes.

I love being casual, just hanging out in jeans and my old vans. But not at a wedding. If the bride is bold enough to try to wear a new pure white dress, the least you can do is put on some shoes.

The guests at this wedding were dressed um... casually. Men in Cuba Vera shirts (i suspect knock offs) jeans and tennis shoes. Add a Wal-mart cowboy hat and you get the picture. Women in empire waist short dresses and tennis shoes.

OK new rule.. if your calves are bigger than your thighs, you are no longer allowed to wear Capri pants. That's just my opinion.

Casual wedding attire... for the men, LONG sleeved shirts tucked in to khakis, a belt and dark shoes of the nonathletic variety.

For the women, dresses in the correct size that come no higher than mid thigh, no neon colors. And SHOES of the nonathletic variety. (flip flops DO NOT count). A moderate heel is preferred.

A wedding is the celebration of the start of a new life for two people who are good enough friends to buy your ass dinner, buy your ass drinks and get your ass out of the house for an afternoon or evening. Do your part by dressing correctly.

OK, now some simple rules about being a good guest.

Don't yell and holler at someone across the room. Go over and talk to them.

Don't stick your fingers in the cake... The bride's uncle did this (we suspect he did it three times).

Do NOT. get up during the ceremony and go over to the dinner tables and plop down your Louis knock off suitcase you call a purse on the table because you want a seat near the buffet table.

Do not bring your gift to the reception, send it to the couple BEFORE the ceremony.

DO thank the parents as you leave the reception. Even if they didn't pay for the day. They are considered the hosts.

Do not take the centerpiece unless you've been told by the hosts that it is OK. And you are not allowed to take them till the event is over. And do not take more than one.

When participating in the toasts, never mention past indiscretions of the bride or groom. No stories about either of them vomiting outside Chili's or how the bride can out drink an Australian sailor with the flu. If the story involves one member of the happy couple in the back of a Ford F250... don't tell it till after they cut the cake. And then only tell it to the people at your table.

Never ever say to the mother of the groom... "That's a lovely dress, didn't it come in your size?"
(leave that to the florist)

One trip to the buffet is the limit,(unless the reception was held at Fresh Choice) If the plate is too heavy to carry on your own, then you have taken too much.

As far as manners go, A wedding should be treated like a funeral with out the squabbling over Grandma's Noritake China service for 8. Be respectful. Your behavior and appearance at a wedding should never rate a guest spot on Jerry Springer, no matter how tempting that is to you.

The topper to the day in Sebastopol, was discovering a dead cat on the lawn during the reception. After all it IS the country.

OUCH... Stop It....That Hurts

I have managed to go 47 years without doing too much serious damage to myself... Little did I know, that a man made Bamboo plant would take me down.

I guess it's karma... speak your mind about something and it will come around to bite you in the lower back.

It feels like a 1978 Pinto, rammed into me, dead square in my lower back. I never did like Pintos, the horses are OK I guess., the beans , not so much, the exploding cars.. no thanks.

I lifted an 8' tall fake bamboo plant into a 5' tall container. Apparently I shouldn't have. Why, you ask, did I lift said fake plant into said container? I'm a giver. yeah that's it, That's my story and I am sticking to it.

I like to give....

Advice, instructions, opinions, directions, (my favorite direction is to get on the 38 Geary bus, go to the end of the line, cross the street, board the bus heading back and ask the driver your silly question.) It's a wonder I haven't been shot by a tourist from Kalamazoo or El Segundo.

I also like to give grief, at least that's what they tell me.

Really, the back wall of that tradeshow booth looks like Walt Disney's tomb lit up for St. Patrick's day. Upon hearing this, some said I was harsh, some said brutal. All said OMFG.

Good design can go bad with a simple wrong choice of a color gel. Green lighting belongs at Disneyland and the nearest Irish bar on March 17th.

Apparently, mediocre is good enough, Not for me it isn't.

Life is full of compromises, but I don't compromise on design. If its good, I will tell you, if it's bad, I will tell you louder. I expect the same.

And don't play at being designer, it's insulting. Leave it to the professionals. I have never heard of an amateur skyscraper window washer. At least not a live one.

Being a designer takes years of study, whether formal or not, a keen eye for detail, and the ability to look at something and translate that inspiration into something fresh and different. Another aspect of design is the ability to foresee something working the way it was intended. Color, light, shadow, scale, positive and negative space, spacial planning, texture, did I mention color?. How will all these elements work together in the space you are designing? If the light is too harsh or too bright, how does that effect the other elements? If there is too much black showing on the charger, what does it do to the dinner plate? EVERYTHING matters, its the details.

Some mistake my passion for bitchiness, yes I am bitchy. It's part of my charm. But above all I am passionate about what I do, I design.

Words used to describe me in the recent past have included.. bitchy, caustic, harsh, honest, sweet (thanks mom), kind, generous, professional, talented, exuberant. I will take them all.

I will also take a crane to lift me off this couch.

There seems to be a trend these days towards a kinder, gentler attitude of "oh, it's OK, No one will notice". I NOTICED. Just OK is NOT good enough. It can be perfect with just a little attention to the details and a little listening to a professional.

That's where I come in.

And now back to our regular programming...

ok... who designed THAT

Everything is designed... everything. The layout of the local newspaper was designed by someone. The embossed pattern on toilet paper was designed by someone. (Yeah that's a resume' highlight) Levi's were designed and redesigned. That little can of air, that I use to dust the keyboard of this designed computer, was designed by someone.

Sometimes, as I walk to the corner store. I HAVE TO WALK, THERE'S NO PARKING! I notice the ornamentation on the building across the street and the pattern at the base of the light poles. the paint colors of the buildings, the mini blinds or cheap curtains in the windows. And I realize, everything is designed. Now not all of these designed objects are as great as the Golden Gate Bridge or the Four Seasons Hotel.

Good design doesn't have to cost a fortune, but the designer should be compensated for using his creativity and talents. Each designer uses a personal criteria on how they determine what their talents are worth.

It may astonish you to learn that I am a designer. And I still haven't figured out how much I am worth.

I look at everything with an eye towards redesigning it. That aforementioned corner store needs a coat of paint and some modern shelves. Subway's counters need to be higher and better pics on the menu. The Chinese restaurant next door should lose the fluorescent lighting and use something softer. I don't want to look like a corpse while I'm eating chicken fried rice. I'd like to design some competence for the chicks at the pizza place on the corner. But even I'm not that good at what i do.

Trees. We need more trees, in beautiful designed planters along the sidewalks.

Can someone design some manners for the brats from the "Art Academy". Well maybe everything isn't designed after all.

But don't tell that to the guy who designed the embossed patterns on the toilet paper.

CSI San Francisco

I promised to make sense of the last post.

Here Goes... I've watched too many episodes of CSI.
This year at Bouquets to art, I was assigned a piece of conceptual art by Bruce Nauman. Two neon faces with flashing hands. each poking the others eye out.

The piece is titled Double Poke in the Eye II.

I have to admit I have never paid too much attention to this piece on my visits to the deYoung. In previous years, other designers have chosen to focus on the colorful neon aspects of this sculpture.

When I actually studied Nauman's work, I was struck by it's dark and violent nature. I used two manequin heads, painted white and gouged an eye out on each (that was FUN).

Red Hanging Amaranthus and Antherium are used to simulate blood oozing from the eye sockets. Rannucula petals, Vanda Orchid blooms and Hypericum berries were glued to the forms suggesting blood splatters. Hypericum berries peared on blades of Steel Grass mimic blood droplets in motion.

Yeah I know, I need therapy.

This piece ellicited many of the responses I expected at the opening night cocktail party, ranging from humor to horror.

Just like life.

I just want to gouge my eyes out...

It's an unexpected Saturday off... phone has been ringing off the hook.. (that means more than 4 calls).

what to do?

I have mentally redesigned my Bouquets to Art piece a million times.. Can't wait to gouge those eyes out. Trust me, that will make sense and not seem so violent on Monday.

Bouquets to Art is a fundraiser for the Fine Arts Museums of San Francisco. Florists, Floral designers and garden clubs from all over the bay area are asked to interpret a piece of fine art in flowers.

On a Monday in January, 100's of us trudge off to the de Young Museum in Golden Gate Park and wander the galleries looking for the piece of art that inspires us. Well, actually we specify our top 5 choices and then a committee assigns us one of those choices. This year I did not receive any of my choices. No worries... I let them know I would be happy with any location they gave me. I forgot about the neon...

Flash forward, I get the letter telling me of my location. I remembered the neon. ugh.

What I love about doing this project is the total lack of design "requirements". No one to tell me what I "have" to design or what they want me to design, no budgetary constraints other than the amount of cash I have in my pocket.

The only design restrictions are on certain types of materials. Obviously the museum is concerned with keeping the art safe, and flower pests can do irreparable harm to some of the more fragile pieces of "art". Taking all these requirements into consideration, causes the designer to really have to think about their design.

Some think harder than others.

So, I've spent the last couple of days constructing the design in my mind. All of which will probably go out the window as I actually design my piece on Monday morning.

Being a floral designer, one that is employed and has clients, my designs are subjected to the tastes of the consumer. It's very rare that a client doesn't play at being the designer or impose their favorite flowers, styles, colors and ideas (magazine pics, pics of other designers work, et al) on the process of designing an event. One just goes with the flow.

My definition of a florist... one who copies a pic out of a book or catalog...
A Floral designer is one that composes all the elements, textures, colors, vessels and accents to form an original creation. Possibly inspired and influenced by others, but the end result is his or her original perspective.

Monday's creation will be my original perspective.

Stay tuned...


For a glimpse at my past Bouquets to Art compositions visit ...

http://patrickknight.net/bta_001.htm

voted off the island... march 7, 2008

Imagine siting at a keyboard in an uncomfortable chair all day long doing nothing but pressing the 'Q' key over and over again and being paid to do it. At what point do you lose it and go "Floral"???

Going Floral is my equivalent of the wonderful 1980's craze of going Postal. This process involves no guns, but does require a very dull folding knife, a pair of expensive pruners with a rusty, nicked blade, 37 yards of corsage tape (light green is preferred) and the ability artfully arrange two dozen very old roses in an unconventional vase or orifice. Thorns on.

Now back to the story... Picture it ... Treasure Island, 2008

Imagine having to dumb down just to do a job. Would you? Could you? This week, I have been trapped on decrepit island in the middle of a decrepit bridge in the middle of the bay. A famous New York designer is in "town" to produce a wedding reception for wealthy clients. Well so far, he isn't in town, the "team" is. As with all successful people, the physical work is done by others. A job of this scale requires a crew of a people that work well together. And apparently people who don't mind doing mindless, agonizingly painfully boring work.

I do mind. This type of work, quite frankly is what i did when i was younger and inexperienced. Been there, Done that. Got the bad back to prove it.

When I am hired as a designer, I expect to use my skills, talent and intelligence to the benefit of the person that hired me. This is not one of those jobs. And as the little flashes of light started to appear in my field of vision, and the dull ache in my temples was just teetering on throbbing, I realized Fuck It, I need the money.

One of the things i will take from this experience, is the humor I will find in those who will boast for the next 25 years that they worked with Preston Bailey. I will find it both humorous and pathetic. We did not work with Preston Bailey. We preformed the equivalent of salting the fries at Wendy's. Dave may have come up with the burger, but Jose slaps the ketchup on and Darnell gets Karpal Tunnel shaking the salt.

No, I didn't work with Preston Bailey. I didn't expect to. I worked for his company. And for 3 days I got to do mindless repetitive boring work for which i am overqualified. Helen Keller wearing a blindfold could have done this job and still not have fucked it up.

I hope the bride and groom have a happy life together.